On Sunday July 27, 2014 I was just about 37 weeks pregnant and I felt awful. I can't really explain it, I just felt sick (although I can't say I was ever feeling really great at that point, being so extremely pregnant with twins in the end of July was pretty much guaranteeing I was always feeling kind of crummy!) All I wanted to do all day was lay down. I could barely eat, barely move, barely walk. It's safe to say I was pretty miserable and was very ready to have these babies out! My husband was great and doted on me all day; always making sure I had a drink, making sure the air was cool enough, making sure I had enough pillows. I had never gone into labor before (I was induced with my daughter), so I didn't really know the signs. I had a doctor appointment the next day along with a non stress test at the hospital so I figured we would know what was going on then! I woke up Monday feeling a little better but still very crampy and nauseous. I got ready and went to my NST. While I was there a nurse checked me after I explained to her how I was feeling and I was 2cm dilated! However, 2cm isn't really anything to get too excited about so she told me I could be in labor but we will have to wait and see. After she checked me things really kicked into high gear. I was cramping badly and felt so sick. I needed to kill some time before my appointment at my doctor's office so I went to JoAnne fabrics and also to WalMart to pick up some things I needed. It was so hard walking around these stores but I did it and made it to the doctors office. While I was sitting waiting to be called back I all of a sudden broke out into a sweat and I got an extremely sharp pain in the middle of my lower back. It was as if I was being stabbed. I could have started crying right then and there from the pain. That's the moment I knew. That second I was SURE I was in labor. They called me back and I told the doctor all that was going on, she checked me and I was know 4cm dilated! She smiled, hugged me and said "Congratulations, you're in labor! Let's go have those boys!" I was so excited and so nervous at the same time. I thought to myself "This is it! You're about to have two more children!" That thought hit me like a ton of bricks. It all got so real that I was going to have two tiny babies to care for. I got out of the office and into my car and drove to the hospital. When I walked to the desk to check in I said to the woman "Hi, my name is Kelly and I'm in labor!" She looked like she could have passed out. She said to me "How did you get here? Are you alone?" I told her yes I was alone and that I had driven myself (my husband was working and was on his way to meet me). She asked if I wanted a wheelchair, I told her I was fine and could walk to the labor and delivery unit by myself. I got up there and they hooked me up to the machines and it was go time! Except it wasn't. Turns out, these tiny boys of mine were very stubborn. I stalled at 6cms. I tried EVERYTHING. I walked. I changed positions. I walked some more. Nothing. My doctor is excellent and knew how badly I wanted a natural delivery and let me wait overnight to see if I progressed some more. 7:00 a.m. rolled around and unfortunately there was no more progress. My doctor advised me he thought the best option at this point was a C-section. I'm not going to lie, there were tears and lots of them. I was so upset, but I wanted what was best for my boys. On July 29th, 2014 at 8:41 in the morning Adam James was born. I heard his little cry and was overjoyed. They held him up but I couldn't see him over the drape. I panicked and looked to my husbands face for reassurance and he said to me "Kell, he's perfect." I had no time to react because at 8:42 Collin Richard was born. I was able to see him, he was so cute and tiny. I was so relieved it was all over and my boys were here!
They took the boys to do their assessment and got me all cleaned up and over to the recovery room. I was waiting for my sweet boys for what seemed to be forever. Finally they brought Collin to me. I bawled when I saw him. He was so perfect. His little nose was no bigger than a tiny jelly bean. He had beautiful deep blue eyes. Talk about love at first sight! I tried to nurse him but he was having trouble breathing so they took him back to the nursery and brought me Adam. Love at first sight again! It was incredible. He looked so different than his brother (which I was so relieved about because I had reoccurring nightmares where I wasn't able to tell them apart!). He was a little smaller than Collin but not much. He had a full head of the softest hair I had ever felt. His little hands grabbed for me and my heart swelled. I then tried to nurse him but the same thing happened, he was having trouble breathing and they took him too. I was crushed. I couldn't believe I waited all this time to see them, to hold them, to love them, and then they were gone. I was so mad. None of this was according to plan. I wanted my babies and wanted to get out of that bed and go to them, but at that point I still had some recovering to do and had to just wait it out. That was one of the most awful times in my life.
Finally I was moved over to my room and of course I wanted to see my babies. I said to the nurse I need to see them, and to please get me a wheel chair. She was worried that it was too soon for me to get up and that I wouldn't be steady enough on my feet. I said to her "Listen, I am going to see my sons, with or without your help". I think she could tell how serious I was and brought a wheelchair for me. I got into it with no problem and my husband wheeled me over to the special care nursery. Both Adam and Collin were hooked up to CPAP machines due to their lung immaturity, other than that they were doing ok. I spent the rest of the day with them in the nursery. On Wednesday they were both doing ok, but Adam was doing slightly better than Collin. They took off Adam's CPAP and told me if he continued doing as well as he was he would be able to be discharged into the regular nursery. I was thrilled, but still worried for my little Coll. I went back to my room to pump and get something to eat and while I was there the doctor came in and informed me Collin needed a chest tube. I felt like I got punched in the stomach. I was so worried for him and still couldn't believe all of this was happening. They inserted the tube, Collin started to improve and Adam continued doing well. On Thursday morning Adam was discharged to the regular nursery. I was SO excited. I kept him with me all day, dressed him in the first little outfit I got for them and snuggled him non stop. I stayed with Collin and made sure he knew his Mommy was there with him. He's such a little fighter that he ended up pulling out his own chest tube, however they did an X-Ray and it showed his lung had healed and he no longer needed it so a new one did not need to be reinserted. I can't tell you how many times I thanked God that day.
We were able to stay in the hospital a few more days even thought Adam and I were discharged. The nurses and doctors were so great and knew I wanted to be there for Collin so they kept us for as long as they could. Adam and I were discharged on Sunday August 3rd and home we went, leaving Collin at the hospital. I can't even begin to explain the emotions I felt. I was SO happy to have Adam home and have him be healthy but I was also so worried about Collin and HATED having to leave him. I know it wasn't the case but I felt like I was abandoning him. He continued to improve and on Tuesday August 6th he was ready to come home with us. He passed his car seat test with flying colors and was doing perfectly. When we drove out of that hospital with both of our boys and our daughter in the car I felt like a million bucks. I was ecstatic to start our life as a family of five!
In labor!
Hubby fast asleep! ;)
Ready for the OR!
They're here! Adam James and Collin Richard <3
Twins!
Adam James <3
Collin Richard <3
Sweet baby Adam is free of tubes!
Mommy and Adam snuggles
Adam in his first outfit
Ashley meeting Adam!
Adam and I on our way home
Brothers <3
On our way with BOTH babies!
Bill with his sons
Home <3
XOXO- Kelly